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October 14, 2013 by Karin Leave a Comment

It All Counts Here

31 Days of Good Deeds 31 Days of Good Deeds

(click here for the series)

~ Day 12 ~

We think we have it all figured out the day they are born. Well at least some of it.

We think we know the decisions we will make and the direction we will go.

We are pretty sure the best and wisest choices will be crystal clear when the time comes.

Then, we realize… we gave birth to humans.

Not so simple anymore.

This quest for good deeds…

I joked with my husband as I headed out the door with the oldest two.  He had come home early from work. Mission… orthodontist.

Look, it’s your good deed.  You are staying here with the others.

He laughed,

Yea, that’s called parenting.  It doesn’t qualify as a good deed.

Or does it?

My oldest girl snuck quietly into the bedroom, plate in hand. She whispered,

Mom, I wanted to bring you breakfast in bed.

The sparkling silver covering revealed the most divine piece of toast I had ever seen.  And, coffee, too. Perfect.

breakfast in bed

She grinned at my reaction,

It’s no big deal, mom. 

Or is it?

Hands scrubbing sud-covered pots tonight… for the 776th time.  Solo mama bone weary from chasing a napless toddler while trying to de-clutter the one place my warrior can study in some sort of peace.  My big boy wraps arms around my waist (when did he get so tall?),

You are the best, mom.

Kind words.  No biggie.

Or are they?

Searching for these good deeds in all corners.  A girlfriend sends me a message,

I cleaned my daughter’s hamster cage today. She will be so happy and I’m hoping it is a real lesson in grace. Does that count?

Does it count?

Lessons in grace.

I put sleepy, baby blue-eyed girl to bed, and whispered into her sweet thumb-sucking gaze,

I’ve tried to make all the right choices for you babies. I hope that counts.

Baby grinned.  Peace enveloped.  Grace to erase the stress of this day.

The good deed of grace… that starts right at home.

Home… the most challenging place to plant a good deed on many days.

Home… the most necessary place to give and seek good deeds every day.

The place that comes first in the lifting of this world.  Home.

It all counts here.

 

Galatians 6:9-11

Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up. Therefore, as we have opportunity, let us do good to all people, especially to those who belong to the family of believers.

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Filed Under: A Day in the Life, Family, Good Deeds, Grace, Motherhood, The Good Stuff Tagged With: grace at home, it all counts

October 10, 2013 by Karin 2 Comments

When You Are Ready For Battle

31 Days of Good Deeds 31 Days of Good Deeds

(click here for the series)

 ~ Day 9 ~

It’s been one of those days.

A day with patience in short supply and tempers flickering with every tiny twig thrown into the growing inferno.

The inferno inside a weary mom.

Fuming words have flown from this mama’s tongue today… followed sheepishly by,

I’m sorry.  Again.

The days we can’t seem to control our tongues and our tempers.  These days get to me the most.  Haven’t I learned yet?  Haven’t I gotten past all this? Shouldn’t I be better than this by now?

I’ve had years of practice in this patience place.  But, some days, I end up right at the beginning.

Frustrations and expectations get in the way and blur the truth.  We prepare for battle and get our weapons ready.  Ready to fire those jagged words… aiming to cut to the source of all our anger.

Then, sometimes, we are knocked from our battle stance.  Kids disarm us with kisses, hugs, and life-giving words.

Weapons down

Sometimes, we are ready to fire, and someone… a stranger… delivers an unexpected blow.  Of kindness.

Thank you, Diana (you can find Diana’s blog here), for sharing your story… and your humility…

Three weeks after I bought it, my brand-new-to-me used car started shifting like I was doing a bad job driving a standard, when in fact I was driving an automatic.  Since it was still under warranty, I took it back to the dealer/repair shop I had purchased it from to get it fixed. They tried a simple solution and that didn’t work, so I took it back for a second round of more intensive treatment.

It took a while for the part they needed to come in, but finally the day when my car was supposed to be ready drew near. My mother was going to be in the area of the dealership with my aunt and uncle the next day, and was willing to pick up the car for me.  I called ahead to find out if it would be ready and if there would be a charge for the repairs so I could send money with her if needed.

“No, you haven’t had the car very long, so that’s something we’re going to have to take care of,” the mechanic told me. I was happy with that answer, so I thanked him and told him to expect my mother the next afternoon. However, the next evening I found out that the car wasn’t ready when my mom went to pick it up.  Something more urgent had come up at the garage. I waited another day, and after I got home from work my mom told me that the mechanic had called and said the car was ready. However, the part had cost more than expected, so the mechanic said that the garage would only pay half the bill, as per my warranty, and I would have to pay the other half – $300. I was more than a little shocked and unhappy. One day I owed nothing, and the next, I owed $300.

Black thoughts filled my mind as I rode to the dealership with my mother the next day. I was ready to give the people at the dealership a piece of my mind and make sure they knew I would not recommend their business to anyone again.

I walked into the office, ready to do battle. It was empty, and my mother and I waited for a few minutes before I got up the courage to call “Hello!” into the empty space beyond the desk. Immediately the mechanic, a perpetually smiling man, emerged from the garage, apologizing for not hearing us come in. Before I could unload both barrels on him, he explained in a quiet voice that his boss had been gone that week and they had been short-staffed. He apologized for the miscommunication about the fees. He said he had to do what his boss told him, but he wanted to help me out personally in whatever way he could. I didn’t know what he meant by that, but I continued listening as he explained the work that had been done on my car and a couple of discounts they had given me. When he was finished, he again said, “I feel bad about this, so I want to help you out personally however I can.” With that, he pulled a fifty dollar bill out of his wallet and laid it on my car bill.
“Oh. You don’t have to do that,” I said, amazed at his gesture. But he again reiterated that he wanted to help, so with tears in my eyes I thanked him and paid the remainder of the bill. Here I had been ready to slaughter the man for going back on his word, and he had simply made a mistake during a stressful work week. His willingness to make it right, even though it cost him personally, restored my faith in humankind. The $250 dollars I had to pay was no longer a burden; it was a blessing and a lesson for me that I will never forget.
I cried the whole way home, rebuked for my evil thoughts and profoundly grateful for the kindness of a mechanic and the loving provision of my Heavenly Father.

 

Weapons down.

Thankfulness.  It trumps anger… every time.

 

Colossians 3:12-13

Therefore, as God’s chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience. Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you may have against one another. Forgive as the Lord forgave you.

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Filed Under: A Day in the Life, Good Deeds, Mercy, Patience, The Good Stuff Tagged With: battle words, weapons down

October 9, 2013 by Karin 2 Comments

We All Need It

31 Days of Good Deeds 31 Days of Good Deeds

(click here for the series)

~ Day 8 ~

Remember the first date?

Ours was on a Harley to a crab shack situated next to a glistening river.  It was a beautiful day in May.

It was the kind of date I knew would settle into my memory forever.

A few weeks later, we were engaged.  A few more months and one deployment went by, and we were married.  Still another few months, another deployment, and we celebrated with an official wedding.

I roll those memories around in my mind on the days that my elbows are lost in dishes, laundry, dirty diapers, and school work.

I smile at this lively six pack of ours and remember the travels we enjoyed… way back then.

These days of babies… growing to big kids… growing to pre-teens are a wild and blurry race.  These days are the ones that really grow us.  These days are the ones when love learns the grit of perseverance.  When love learns the true meaning of patience.  When love shows what it’s really made of.  When God shows us… what we are really made of.

And, sometimes, we are given rest.

we all need it

The rare and sacred time away to remember what that first date was really all about.

And, sometimes, someone older and wiser… someone who has been there, lived it, and loved it… appears. Someone who sees the strain, the drain, and the need for release.  This someone comes along, passes the baton of hope and encouragement, shares the joy of the moment ~ for just a moment, and let’s you know you are right where you supposed to be.

This story from my friend Laura is about the parents… the couples… who have been through it.  They remember these days, wish us well, offer a gift, and push us to keep going…

We were at Bunhuggers (a burger restaurant in Flagstaff) and began talking with another couple behind us in line. They were a bit older than us, but were coincidentally on their once a year weekend getaway, just like us. We talked about our kids and our love for the busy stage of life that we are in. After orders were placed we each sat down at different tables. At Bunhuggers, you pay when the food is called out and picked up. We didn’t hear our number called, so my husband went up to ask about it.  He was told that that nice couple we chatted with in line paid for our order. We went together to ask if there was some confusion. When they simultaneously began to smile, we realized that it was on purpose. We thanked them and were humbled by their kindness. They said that their kids were older and they knew how much they would have loved if someone had picked up their tab in our stage. They said, “just pay it forward sometime to someone who doesn’t look at all like they need it. Have a good night.” It was a heartwarming high note to end our trip on.

Remembering the days gone by with couples who have been there… gives us hope… and rest.

Just pay it forward to someone who doesn’t look at all like they need it… because we all need it.

1 Timothy 6:17-19

Command those who are rich in this present world not to be arrogant nor to put their hope in wealth, which is so uncertain, but to put their hope in God, who richly provides us with everything for our enjoyment. Command them to do good, to be rich in good deeds, and to be generous and willing to share. In this way they will lay up treasure for themselves as a firm foundation for the coming age, so that they may take hold of the life that is truly life.

Karin signature

Filed Under: A Day in the Life, Community, Good Deeds, Perseverance, The Good Stuff, Together Tagged With: pay it forward, we all need it

October 8, 2013 by Karin 4 Comments

Cheer Them On

31 Days of Good Deeds 31 Days of Good Deeds

(click here to see the series)

~ Day 7 ~

We don’t deserve it.

At least, most of the time, we feel like we don’t.

Everyone we see could use a little lift, and many of us could use a big one.

Writing about good deeds this month, I have seen so many stories about people lifting up people around them.  Many times the people are strangers. The stories are touching and remind us that, despite the bad news we too often hear, many people out there are kind.  Many people out there notice others.  Many people take a step and show gratitude.

The stories inspire me to notice more… to say “thank you” more.

This story from my friend Renee shows us that we may not think we deserve praise or thanks, but others may see that differently… 

My daughter and two fellow cadets were in the Atlanta airport returning home from field training this summer. They were all dressed in their ABU’s and were grabbing something to eat at T.G.I. Fridays. A couple went up to the cadets and said “thank you” for their service and paid for their meal. The cadets explained to them that they were just cadets in ROTC in college. The couple said it didn’t matter to them because they are still serving our country. They thanked them again and paid for their meal. So cool and very touching.

The best part of this story is that these kind strangers cheered on someone’s children.  One of the most important things we can do is cheer on the next generation.  Our kids, and someone else’s kids.

Cheer On

Every young person needs that.

 

Psalm 78:4

We will not hide them from their descendants; we will tell the next generation the praiseworthy deeds of the Lord, his power, and the wonders he has done.

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Filed Under: A Day in the Life, Community, Good Deeds, Military, The Good Stuff Tagged With: cheer 'em on, the next generation

October 7, 2013 by Karin 4 Comments

It Just Keeps Giving

31 Days of Good Deeds

(click here to see the series)

31 Days of Good Deeds

~ Day 6 ~

We have those friends.

The ones who serve, give, and go out of their way to help.  They appear at just that moment when we need an extra hand… an extra heart… and just one kind word.

Then, they insist that the whole thing is no big deal.

We have these friends that show us how to be better.

They help us open our eyes to people around us. They drop a note and a gift at the door after a miscarriage. They bring a home-cooked meal during a deployment.  They drive through walls of snow just to get goat milk for a mom with a house full of kids, an empty refrigerator, and a husband… deployed again.  They text a message just when we think God isn’t listening anymore… and they let us know that He is.

We have these friends.  They grow our hearts and pick us up.  Sometimes they are a life line.  These friends. They are some of the greatest gifts He gives us.

Cheer on love

Then, we hear a story about someone else who noticed our friend. Someone who just wanted to show love. Someone who saw the gift that this friend is, without even knowing her.

And, the story grows our heart just a little bit more.

Thanks for sharing this story, Jill, my dear friend…

I was traveling with my three kids, and at the airport this guy (who was with his wife and two kids) kept trying to offer help in the security line. Very nice, but my kids had done it a million times so he saw they knew the drill. Somehow he figured out my husband was military and continued to help us as we were gathering our things from security, thanking me for my husband’s service. We later ran into each other at the food court as I looked up with my hands full of bags and ALL the tables full. He motioned over to an empty table that ‘magically’ became open, and said he found a spot for us. I left the boys at the table and took my daughter to get our food and drinks. When I came back, I saw him leaving the table and talking with my boys which freaked me out a little. As he walked off he said, “Your oldest son has something for you.” He explained that he told my son that he knows they shouldn’t be talking to strangers, but he wanted to do something for our family. He put something in my son’s hand and said, “Don’t open it until your mom is here at the table and I am gone.” (Still a little odd). Well, I got to the table and my son opened his hand and it was a $50 dollar bill! Thankfully, we saw him on the way to our gate and we thanked him.  He said he just wanted to buy us a lunch or some treats for the kids to thank us for us being a military family.

Showing love to people we don’t even know… gives love to them, and everyone else who loves them.

It just keeps on giving.

John 13:34

“A new command I give you: Love one another.  As I have loved you, so you must love one another.

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Filed Under: A Day in the Life, Community, Good Deeds, Love, Military, The Good Stuff Tagged With: it just keeps giving, that friend

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Meet Karin

Hi! My name is Karin Madden. Writer. Warrior wife. Mom of six pack. Homeschooler. German-blooded southerner. Welcome to the place where I explore what it means to grow stronger - spirit, soul, and body. I write to inspire and encourage - to remind you we are not alone. By being bold with grace and speaking truth in love, we can become who we are meant to be. I'm glad you are here.

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